He cheated but I love him so much

He cheated but I love him so much

I am going to divorce because my husband cheating on me.  I did not know how long ago but he told me only 2-3 months, I don’t believe that. Now he told me that he wants to start over with me. he wants me to move back hone and he will move out because he can’t control his temper and we will fight again. I stay home with my children and if we can we will stay with each other later like in few years.  Does he really mean it or he just want a convenience to see his kids? He said he still love me but he can’t stay with me now. it’s not a good time yet. i am thinking he has not clearly make up his mind yet .  He still thinking should it be me or his girlfriend? I love him so much. Please advise me if he still love me or not/  Thanks signed liz1974, age 32

Dear liz1974, Why is it his decision?  You should be the one deciding whether you want him back and if you could ever trust him again.  Love is never enough to make a relationship work.  Please see our article on the Five Myths of Love.  You need trust and respect at the top of the list and both of those things are missing when a partner cheats.  Please also read our article on unfaithful .  After reading those two articles I would suggest some counseling for you.  Check with your Doctor, Church Advisor, or Social Services for a good referral.  A counselor can help you see clearly and then you can decide whether to give your husband a second change.

Now to answer your question: “Does he still love me or not”.  He is the only one that can truly answer that question.  However with that said I will tell you that many men can still love their wives and yet continue to cheat on them or have affairs.  Some men are incapable of being monogamous and some men don’t practice enough self-control in those matters.  The decision must be yours – can you really forgive this man and trust him after he cheated on you?  Can you be sure it will not happen again?  Answer those questions for yourself and then take it from there.  I wish you well and hope that you will make this your decision not his. 


Please understand you have free will.  This advice is given only in the realm of personal growth and self-help. This is not to be considered a substitute for therapy or professional counseling.  We wish you well.

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