I would like to work on my self-confidence and communication, do you have any ideas or thoughts? I feel I have lost some of this as I was going through a difficult time in my life and have compromised my values and beliefs. Thank you!, signed, self-confidence, age 43
Dear Self-confidence, anytime we compromise our values and beliefs that can take a toll on our self-confidence. The only way to build that confidence back is to first define what are your beliefs and values. Once you define what those let them be reflected in everything you do. Be totally honest with yourself. Take a good look at what you feel you have done wrong in your life up to this point. Take some time and write down all that you feel you have done wrong and then read them out loud and then to yourself at least once. After that destroy the list by burning it or shredding it and while destroying it say something like “I forgive myself and go free”.
Once that is done please read the following two articles. Forgive and Go Free and What you think and speak. Building self-confidence takes time and it is best built one step at a time. One accomplishment at a time. Set yourself a small goal and then work to reach that goal. Each time you succeed you will build self-confidence. Once one small goal is met then set another one. Each success will bring more confidence.
As far as communication goes some of the best communicators in the world are good listeners rather that speakers. They show sincere interest in others. They keep good eye contact, nod occasionally to show they are listening and then they ask questions to show interest in the other person. If you haven’t read all of our articles on body language please do so. The better body language you have the better communicator you will be. Up to 93% of our communication is through body language. Practice improving your body language and in turn you will improve your self-confidence and your communication skills.
Please understand you have free will. This advice is given only in the realm of personal growth and self-help. This is not to be considered a substitute for therapy or professional counseling. We wish you well.